China frets over its ‘sissy’ boys

As the mother of a 13-year-old boy, with heightened expectations from her son, Li Xiaohui is given much to worry about. Oddly, her son’s choice of pop music idols figures pretty high on that list. “I just can’t make out whether they are boys or girls,” she says with a chuckle, referring to the androgynous Mandopop stars that are quite the rage in China.

Beneath her good-humoured banter, however, lies a deeper concern: that her pampered son may perhaps grow up to be not much of a man, given the absence of sufficient male influences and role models in his day-to-day life.

That concern is widely shared in China today by many parents who believe that a social and education system that places a premium on gender equality is perhaps turning their boys into “sissies”.

This societal concern is also reflected within the pages of a recent best-seller, Zheng Jiu Nan Hai (Save the Boys), which argues persuasively that popular cultural influences in China and a competitive education system that rewards obedience and cramps individualism are keeping boys from being, well, boys.

“Today, boys in China face a crisis of identity, but it has been largely overlooked, partly owing to ignorance of the underlying causes,” says Sun Yunxiao, deputy director at the China Youth and Children Research Centre, and one of the three authors of the book.

Based on research studies, the authors identify four underlying crises — in the social, psychological, institutional and educational — that account for this societal problem. “Among these, the most deadly crisis is the crisis in education,” reasons Sun.

In particular, the education system, which uses the same metric to evaluate all children — be they boys or girls — does boys an enormous disservice, he argues. “It is an indisputable fact that boys and girls are different, but with its emphasis on rote learning, without access to other channels of knowledge, including hands-on experience where boys might excel, the education system has been reduced to a form of hard labour.”

Even from a physiological point of view, boys are late bloomers, and should ideally start schooling later than girls, the book argues. Sun points out that in August of each year, there is a rash of Caesarean births at hospitals across China — because parents want their children’s birth to be timed for the academic calendar for fear of losing a year.

Boys also need more physical activity, even the licence to walk around in classrooms, but by cramping them with obedience rules, the education system is slowly emasculating them, says Sun. “Just like the eagle needs the sky, and a horse needs grasslands, so also a boy’s nature is determined by his ability to move around... If that is inhibited, there will be no boys, and no men,” he adds.

Additionally, the gender profile of school teachers — about 80% of whom are female — and the fact that not many fathers play a hands-on role in their sons’ upbringing and character evolution are factors, the book argues.