A week is a long time, isn't it? After all, they say God made the Universe in seven days.
And it's quite depressing to see this last one week completely transforming our government, or so it seems. I, moments after the Triple Talaq judgment, spoke extensively about how the ruling NDA government is doing a great job with it's pro-women policies.
But the affidavit filed in the Delhi High Court by the Centre shows that shackles of patriarchy are not easing to break.
For those who are not clued in, on Tuesday, the government filed an affidavit in the Delhi High Court saying that 'marital rape can't be criminalised.'
It also said that if rape in marriage is penalised it would threaten the very institution of marriage
Seriously? In 21st century, when India is celebrating 'Beti Bachao, Beti Padhao', when women are winning every 'Dangal' and smashing every hurdle a la Sania Mirza and Saina Nehwal, we are being told that our body is not ours?
That consent in marriage is a given thing? That the husband is 'entitled' to have sex with the wife, even if it's against her wishes?
From Bhaag Milkha Bhaag to Lipstick Under My Burqa, the silver screen has time now and time again tried to bring out the murky, inhuman and uncomfortable truths of many bedrooms in India.
So, what should one assume? Should the half of the population of India make peace with the fact that if it's the husband, then it's OKAY?
No, it's NOT! Remember Pink, the movie? In the last scene of the movie, the brilliant dialogue by Amitabh Bachchan summarises the concept of consent.
'No means no. It can be your friend, your girlfriend, even your wife...no is not just a word, it's a complete sentence.'
It is this concept of consent that is missing from the government's policy framework.
In a written reply to Parliament, the Centre has again and again said that this concept can't be replicated in India. “Marital rape is not applicable in Indian context. The level of education/illiteracy, poverty, myriad social customs and values, religious beliefs, mind-set of the society to treat the marriage as a sacrament.”
This is what our Union Minister Maneka Gandhi told Parliament.
I would like to question not only the government, but also the patriarchal mindset about which 'customs and values' allow the husbands to rape their wives?
And if it's about question of mindset, then isn't it government's duty to change it?
Didn't we change Sati system. Didn't we ban child marriages? These were some practices that were part of Indian society in the name of 'sanskriti' and 'parampara'.
If this government is serious about going the whole mile for women empowerment, than tokenism won't do. And if you, yes you, dear men get agitated by such stories of marital rapes, stop being keyboard ninja and do something.
If you are celebrating the ban on Triple Talaq, than it's time you do some serious introspection on the issue of marital rape.
Cause we can't simply dismiss it by saying 'log kya kaehnge', 'aisa hota hai.' Enough is enough, criminalise marital rape now. Cause it's about woman's consent. If it's not there, it's a rape. Period.
