Deepika Padukone : I'm not comfortable with success

Dressed in a gorgeous off-white Abu Sandeep creation, Deepika Padukone is sitting cross-legged on the red sofa in her home. When I compliment her on the pretty ensemble, she tells me, “It was one of those expensive things I wanted to buy when I could afford it. I bought it many years ago.” And she is still wearing it. Duly noted. 

The actress, who has been shooting for Bajirao Mastani, has just been informed that she won’t be needed back on the sets for 10 days. Excited with this unexpected break, she is making plans to go grocery shopping with some friends after this interview, “I have heard so much about Foodhall in Palladium, I am going to check it out.”  I warn her to take security and she laughs, “Come on, I can’t go grocery shopping with guards!” Yes, this gal definitely doesn’t take her stardom seriously. Which is impressive, given that she is on a streak. Eight hits in a row. The numero uno position tucked firmly under her belt, but she is still not playing it safe —whether taking up a film with an ensemble cast like Finding Fanny or taking a risk by going totally deglam in Piku. Her interesting choices are paying off.  She is in a secure place. So much so, she hasn’t signed any new films apart from Bajirao Mastani and Tamasha. Here, she talks about Piku, the importance of family, the changes and choices she made career-wise and her journey so far.....
 
What was the most difficult part about playing Piku?
The fact that there were no crutches for the character.  In Chennai Express, as an actor, I had an accent to fall back on. In Ram-Leela, there is a different kind of language, here there was nothing. There are a lot of scenes where we did not stick to dialogue on paper; certain lines, certain words, just happened organically because the film itself was so real.  In fact, the most common feedback that we got on the film is that 10 minutes into the film we were transported into that world and you are suddenly feeling like you are in their living room and you are  in the car with them.  So to give that kind of performance, the only direction I got from Shoojit (Sircar), was: just be. So I just had to be and keep it as real as possible because the film doesn’t allow for anything else. You know if one sur was off, or anything went a bit over, it would have been easy to catch that because it’s such a simple film, so simplistically shot. For me, the toughest challenge was to keep every bit as real and seem less as possible.
 
You had co-actors like Bachchan and Irrfan in the film who could’ve eclipsed you. Didn’t you fear that at any point?
No, no, because I looked at it as a learning opportunity. How often does one get the opportunity to work with Amitji and Irrfan in this capacity? I was very excited about the opportunity and the fact that like I said I get to a) learn from them, b) as an actor bounce off them. I think it’s so true, you are only as good as your co-star.

Sharing screen space with Big B in Piku, what were the few attributes or qualities you imbibed from him?
See, I always say that what Amitji does on screen is there for all to see.  The characters that he plays or in the interviews that he does.  I think I am very privileged to see what he does in that interim time, what is he doing before a shot, what is his process. I was really happy to know that he is also someone who rehearses a lot and for me that was very comforting because that is exactly like my work mantra, which is slightly rehearsed, but also open to improvisation. Every actor will have a different process. It was really nice and comforting for me that his work process was similar in the sense, he also would keep asking for rehearsals. That really helped me because I also needed rehearsals. Now imagine if I was in a situation where he would just come to the set and start, what would I have done. Amitji is very different and Irrfan is very different.  With Irrfan you see no process. I would just see the sheet in his hand and for sometime he is looking at it, then that sheet has vanished and he is just in his space before he does the scene.
  
You’re on top of your game right now, doing the biggest films in the business. Did a film like Piku seem like a risk, where you’re not glamourised at all?
It’s not something that’s ever crossed my mind. Not for once did I ever think in Piku how am I going to look because the character didn’t require it. In fact, a lot of the looks from the film are my own. There were days when we were shooting montages, not so much in the longer scenes, I’d  go to the sets in jeans  or a T- shirt with chappals and Shoojit would  say ‘Just be like this today’ and I have literally walked on to set and done the shot because I think the character required that. The film required all the characters to be very real.

Speaking of real, how real is Deepika?
It’s very, very easy to get carried away by the fame, the success, the kind of love, appreciation and adulation that we get. Which is why it’s important to be surrounded by — I won’t say real people, but grounded people. Like my friends, my family, my sister, my parents. It’s like I go to work in the morning and I do what I have to do and they go to work and they do what they have to do, but when we come back, we are us and I am me. I am the same girl that I was in school for my friends. Or the same girl who grew up in Bengaluru. When I go home, when we have no house help at dinner time, we lay our own table, make our own food, serve ourselves from the kitchen, sit at the table, eat and then we all have to wash up.  We divide the work. If my dad is clearing the table, I’ll wipe the table, and mum is washing the dishes, I might empty the dishes, put it back in the fridge, that’s how it is. In the Bengaluru house, it definitely works like that, even over here I am not dependent on my maids at all. If they are up, fine. If they are not, I can manage this house on my own.

You have been on a spree of delivering hits. How much of a high does that give you?
I am not going to deny that it is a very very satisfying feeling and that’s also because it’s a lot of hard work. I have had to learn on the job and I hate saying this, but the fact is that I don’t come from a film family. While my parents have always been extremely supportive of my career decision, I still had to learn from scratch.  I’ve made my mistakes, I have been a part of not-so successful films and had to deal with criticism. I have been through all that, so I can finally appreciate what I am going through in my career now. It’s not fallen in my lap, it’s not been easy. Everyone has different obstacles and different things that they need to deal with, different things that they need to work on and I have had my set of things that I have had to work on to get to where I am today. So, it’s definitely a great feeling but it’s not satisfying to a level where I am now comfortable. Someone recently asked me “This is your eight or ninth consecutive hit back-to-back. Are you getting comfortable with success?” No, I am not getting comfortable with success because with every film that I do, I want to be better than my own self from my previous film and I want my next film to do better than my last film.
 
Is success sweeter when it has come from a movie like Piku as opposed to a movie like Race 2 or Happy New Year?
I would have to say yes because I feel  films like Race 2 or Happy New Year, they are already hit films at some level because  of the kind of team that is coming  together. Race 2 is a sequel of a huge hit,  so it’s a given this one will get a great opening etc. Happy New Year has SRK so… it’s a big film. Some of these things are a given, it’s a different thing whether the films live up to that or not  but some of these films even at an announcement level are exciting and somewhere you already know and assume they are a hit even on paper.  But a film like Piku… For a very long time, people didn’t know about it. People kept asking me, ‘Why are you doing Piku? What is this film about? Constipation? How come you are working with Irrfan, odd pairing.’ I guess the only thing that made sense to people was that I was playing Amitji’s daughter. So yes, definitely when a film like Piku does so well, you do feel a sense of satisfaction.

At the start of your career, you drew a lot of criticism for your diction and dress sense, but you have taken that constructively and changed for the better. Comment.
It’s not that I wasn’t aware of these things before people pointed them out. I mean... what do I do? I am a South Indian and at the end of the day I can’t change that. There is that culture that it’s infused in me that you can never take out of me.  In the South, people don’t speak Hindi that much. I grew up with a completely different cultural background. I look a certain way, I speak a certain way and it’s not that I wasn’t aware. But like you mentioned there are so many things — I wouldn’t want to discuss everything — that I had to work on, had to learn. People said I couldn’t act, my diction was an issue, maybe for some people it still is. But for me my biggest learning was culture. To learn different cultures, but back home when I was growing up (of course, now things are changing because of so many people moving into the city and it’s become way more cosmopolitan now,  one is exposed to much more) we were very insulated, so there was not that much exposure to other cultures and other languages. That exposure I have got only now after coming here to Mumbai and travelling the world.

Are you aware that your journey to the top has been faster than that of any other leading actress?
(Touches wood)  No, it’s not something I am aware of because I am not comparing my graph to anybody else’s. I don’t want my career to be like somebody else’s. I don’t want my work to look like somebody else’s. Acting is a very individual thing. Every person brings something of their own to every character and every film that you do.  So what I bring to my films is very unique to me. Similarly, somebody else will bring something else to the table. Like I said, for me, my only focus has been to  work on myself,  to improve my own craft — to get better at what I do, to get more comfortable with what I do. And as long as my next film is as successful or more successful than my previous film.

You seem to be making the right choice when you are selecting films? How do you go about it?
It’s instinct, yaar. I don’t think there is any thought or calculation as such. It’s definitely instinct and what you believe in and what you stand for.

Any regrets for not doing Dil Dhadakne Do?
It’s just one of those films I think I have been so involved with indirectly that I feel like I am a part of the cast.  That’s also because of the equation that I share with Zoya, Farhan and Ritesh, so it’s definitely no regret at all. In fact, for me it’s the most awaited film of the year.

On the subject on what you stand for, the My Choice video you were part of got a lot of criticism. Your comment?
I was a bit disappointed honestly with the way it all turned out eventually.  What was surprising was that for forty eight hours it went viral in a very  positive way and then suddenly after two days, something changed.  So, it was definitely disappointing because that was never the intention. Maybe I can say that I wasn’t surprised by the reaction or the fact that people felt that certain lines meant certain other things, which it actually didn’t but came across like that and I completely understand that..

You got some flak for agreeing to be at the receiving end at the AIB Roast. Do you regret it now?
What! No, not at all. It’s the same way that I would buy a ticket and go for a play and buy a ticket to watch a movie. I mean, there were four thousand other people in the audience. I was one of them and it was the first time that something like this was coming to the country. I didn’t know what the content of the show was going to be, the same way when you go and watch a film, you are not really sure what you are getting into until you actually watch the entire film.

Among the new lot of heroines, there’s a big display of camaraderie on social media, most of which is fake. Agree?
No I don’t agree. It’s definitely not fake. At least I’d like to believe that, because from my side, it’s not and I think everyone today is more spontaneous. If you feel something, you say it, I guess that’s what it is. There has always been this perception of girls not getting along. We all may not be best friends, the nature of the business doesn’t allow for that but having said that, it’s definitely possible to be cordial and respect one another.

Where do you see yourself five years down the line?
I don’t think I have a five-year plan. I would have a one-and-a-half or a two year plan but recent experiences have made me realise that life is extremely fragile and you have to take, as clichéd as it may sound, you have to take, I wouldn’t say each day as it comes… I am someone who plans a little — 50 per cent is planned and there is some sort of direction and I leave room for spontaneity as well. That’s how I have been. I don’t want to plan every day, I’d like to keep it flexible but still have some direction.

If you fell in love and decided to get married, would you be able to quit acting and lead a domesticated, happy family life away from the limelight?
I can easily do that. For me, nothing is more important than the relevance of family in our lives. That feeling of completeness.

You will be able to give all this up?
I don’t know when that’s going to happen, but I hope that when it does, I do it gracefully. That’s the only advice my parents have given me and I’d want to stick to that and say that I don’t know when it will happen. Or I don’t think I have that vision or plan or whatever, but when it happens, it happens gracefully. I know the importance of family. I mean it really completes me as a person. I want lots of children, I want so many children. I look at babies’ pictures and I am like… I love kids. I find in a selfish way, I spend time with other people’s children like SRK’s son AbRam or Homi Adajania and Anaita’s kids. I find it really therapeutic to spend time with them. So, while I also give the excuse of I love to babysit your child, I am also selfishly using them for my therapy.

Do you find reading therapeutic, too?
I have been at it for a while, but I am still reading Open by Andre Agassi. I relate to it at different levels. I mean, from a sportsman to his struggles to his achievements to his family.  Coming from a sports family, I completely identify with that and I understand sports. There is such a beautiful line in the book. I mean it’s not relevant in any way, but it’s one of those things which I marked. “Hate brings me to my knees, love helps me stand up on my feet”. It’s one of the first, I mean it’s amazing. I also have an Audrey Hepburn book that I picked up but have yet to read.  Also the one on Steve Jobs.
As a child, I was never really fond of reading. Again, it comes down to the  kind of  lifestyle that we had, we were always more outdoors. So go out and cycle and play cricket and play down in the building and things like that. I just had too much energy. You would never find me on ground level. I was always jumping off tables and sofas and breaking things in people’s homes. So, reading was not [my favourite activity]. I prefer listening to music than reading, but I have discovered of late,  in the last two years, that when I read, I am drawn to autobiographies.

QUICK QUESTIONS
Your biggest fear?
Not being able to spend enough time with my parents.After Piku, it’s playing on my mind more and more.

A sure-shot hit film with a top hero where you don't have much of a role or a small film, great role, but risky venture? Which one would you pick?
I would choose the smaller film because that would be more exciting and challenging to do.

If you spot a contemporary at a party, will you go up to her to say hello. Or wait for her to come to you?
I’ll always be the first one to go and acknowledge her.

What do you cook best?
I am a better baker. I make good cookies and brownies and cakes.

A film you can watch over and over
I am sorry that t I have to say this about my own film about Piku. There is so much to learn from that film.

You fav destination?
Home. You know, that feeling of being in your house? I am very comfortable and happy here. Of course, this is home and there is a sense of achievement. You know in a city like this to have your own home, one needs to work really hard but home is Bangalore. That’s where I know that 'Okay, I am home.  That feeling is different when my parents are there and my sister is there, it’s a different feeling.