Jesse James, estranged husband of Hollywood actress Sandra Bullock, has admitted that he "wanted to get caught" betraying her.Motor mechanic James cheated on wife Bullock by having affairs with four women. He admitted that he felt horrible about sleeping with his mistresses and also said that he self-destructed his life."When I was doing it, you know, one, I knew it was horrible. It made me feel horrible. And two, I knew I would get caught eventually, and I think I wanted to get caught," 41-year-old James said in an interview with US TV show Nightline, reports News.com.au. "I don't think I know for a fact now what it was, you know. I mean, it was me trying to self-sabotage my life," he said."It's still hard for me to talk about, a little bit, because I still really love her and care about her," James said about Bullock, who has filed for divorce."I've spent my whole life with the kids and with her trying to protect her from everything, but the most hurt she's ever been caused is by the person that wanted to protect her. It's terrible, and she's going to be hurt for a long time," he added.

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