'Convince yourself I was murdered, for who said I wasn't?' Kolkata girl's suicide note reveals her fight with depression

Written By Kamalika Sengupta | Updated: Jun 22, 2019, 12:49 PM IST

Zee media got exclusive access to the letter. Read for details.

More details have emerged regarding the macabre incident in Kolkata where a Class 10 student of GD Birla School was found dead under mysterious circumstances on Friday.

The girl, a topper in her batch, was found in the school's washroom with her wrist slit and her head wrapped in plastic. After the police arrived with a forensic team, she was rushed to a hospital in Jodhpur Park, where the doctors declared her dead.

Her father arrived at Kolkata from Hyderabad last night.

The three-page suicide note that has been recovered by the police shows, however, that she was in tremendous depression. Zee Media got exclusive access to the macabre contents of the suicide note, which reflect that she was suffering from depression and her mind, battling with the illness, was in a state of mess.

In this suicide note, she wrote that only she is to be held responsible for her death and that she should be given a 'nice funeral'.

It has been stressed repeatedly what she was battling for a long time. "Some saw it some didn't," the letter reads, "They thought their arrogance would suppress her."

However, it is not clear yet who she has been referring to here by 'they', as repeated various times in the three-page suicide note. 

What is discernible from the letter, though, is the fact that she was tremendously unhappy with her parents. The letter reads, "Mom and dad better keep your nose out of stuff. You don't get it. I know you have done a lot for me. Okay, yeah, a lot. But you know, not everyone pays back."

The forensic team is investigating the handwriting. If they do find out that the letter is indeed a suicide note written by her, it then brings out a serious issue that perhaps plagued the girl's daily life - the amount of pressure she was going through without anyone even noticing.

It is written that she could not sleep for the past three months.

Near the end of her letter, she stated, "If me committing suicide is too far fetched for you to grasp, just convince yourself that I was murdered, for who said I wasn't?"

Sources say that she was highly ambitious and her parents supported this too. Reports say she had wanted to get into the Indian Statistical Institute (ISI) after Class 12, for her higher studies.

In every verse of her suicide note, the suffocating air of depression and her simultaneous anger towards her parents is reflected.

Sources reveal that she had earlier, too, tried for suicide. In this letter, she confesses that she had a death wish, and at various times while traveling by Metro she had crossed the safety line.

Moreover, it is being assumed that she had planned for her suicide, as certain portions of her note seem to have been written beforehand.

Pointing towards the fact that her issues were not ever taken seriously, she had said, "It's sad. I needed help and they only said I was doing everything for attention and I did not have the guts to kill myself and here you go".

The police are yet to confirm whether it is suicide or if, on the off chance, anything else.

If she did commit suicide and this is indeed her note, it brings forth serious questions regarding apparently normal parent-child relationships in our daily households and the resultant price that sometimes has to be paid as a result of unaddressed mental health issues.