They say age is just a number, and when it comes to love, the heart does not recognise man-made barriers of age, caste, gender, financial status, etc, which are all swept away in the tidal wave of emotions. And while a couple maybe oblivious to society and its many hiccups, the world around them definitely feels entitled to have an opinion on something that’s clearly not their business.
PriJonas are rocking it as the IT couple
Priyanka Chopra (35) and American singer, Nick Jonas’ (25) whirlwind romance has been fodder for gossip mills for a while now. The duo are in the city to meet PC’s mom, Madhu Chopra. And while they kept the date with her mum, what has got rumour mills in a frenzy is the supposed unofficial declaration from Jonas about their relationship status. The singer recently shared an Instagram story video in which Priyanka can be seen walking towards the camera with a big smile on her face. The word ‘Her’ is written on it with a heart-eye emoji. While PC’s fans root for the couple, trolls have also got to work, trolling the duo for their 10-year age gap. What’s surprising is the extreme reactions to the alleged romance. Age gap supposedly ceases to exist when the man is older than the woman, but that’s not the case when things are reverse if people’s reactions are anything to go by. Why is there a stigma attached to an older woman dating a younger man? That’s the question we posed to relationship experts, and here’s what they had to say.
Age old stereotypes have a role to play here
As much as we are moving towards gender equality, there are some things society still has a problem accepting like a huge age gap especially between an older woman and a younger man. Take the word cougar which is used to describe an elder woman involved with a younger man. The word itself is associated with a predatory nature. Psychiatrist Dr Hemant Mittal elaborates , “All of this stems from the idea than the man has to be a dominant partner in a relationship. Also, healthy child bearing and fertility is associated with younger women. So, this also influences the basic mental makeup where older women are looked as a lesser prospect. Patriarchal system judges women on the basis of their looks and as she ages she is judged for her appearance. Younger men dating an elder woman are seen as non-serious individuals, looking to get something from the relationship rather than give it.”
What you can do about it?
Clinical psychologist Seema Hingorrany believes that this stigma comes from a judgemental attitude people have towards older women, who they believe are not supposed to date younger men. These couples are looked down upon by those who are uncomfortable with the shift of stereotypical roles of men and women and how they should act in relationships. She says, “This belief comes from old conventional thinking where men were always older, so that they could take care of the women who were considered fragile and weak mentally. Unfortunately, those ideas still prevail in a certain section’s psyche. Hence, people still look down on such relationships in our society. The best way to deal with it is to be more confident about your relationship and not give into the outside pressures. The other way of coping is by proving that such relationships are very much functional like any other relationship, especially with people whom you really care about.”
