I am a nervous wreck on my birthdays. Attention makes me anxious. I’m gifted at clumsiness and attention tends to accentuate it. I once broke the television set trying to punch a hit-me doll I’d got as a present. So, I try to avoid celebrations.
But I love thoughtful presents. Two of my favourites have been a card my brother made for my tenth birthday and the other when a friend showed up at my house at midnight for my last birthday.
My brother was nine then and the card had a huge cake, balloons, hearts pierced with arrows and gigantic candies floating in the air on it. The smallest drawings on that card were of him and me in the corner, holding hands. It looked like our own wonderland. The other present was special because the visit was unexpected.
Wonder why I am telling you this? Well, David Beckham turned 34 on Saturday (May 2). And I’ve always wanted to know what he’s like on this day. Not things like Victoria gifted him a Mercedes, or he flew to Greece to have dinner. But what’s his favourite birthday memory, the present he appreciates the most, whether he’d rather be left alone or spend it getting clicked by paparazzi at a public place. Do birthdays make him nervous, as the years add on?
I’ve secretly wished for him to be little bit like me, despite thousands of facts to prove he isn’t. For one, he isn’t clumsy in public. He is an attention seeker. And apparently he loves expensive presents. For his 32nd birthday, wife Victoria whisked him away from Spain on a private jet to London for a shopping spree. She is reported to have treated him to a £14,000 watch, a £4,500 suit, £1,900 hand-made shoes and nearly £400 in shirts. Last year, for his 33rd birthday,
Victoria threw him a series of bashes in Los Angeles, bills again running to thousands of dollars.
There are a couple of things I’ve thought of giving him. If I meet him, I will. Maybe
he’ll appreciate them for their thoughtfulness.
1. Coconut oil — he’s had so much done to the hair, damage is inevitable. Agreed, he has access to the best treatments, but nothing like a champi with warm coconut oil.
2. A magic tattoo eraser — he has so much paint on his body, he’s starting to look like the walls of Sistine Chapel.
The point really is that I am an unabashed fan of David Beckham. And I don’t mind admitting that the thought of him growing older makes me morose. I don’t want him to retire. I don’t want him to go away from the game. I am still hopeful he will make it to South Africa 2010.
For his 34th birthday, my heart-felt wish is that he somehow gets the ability of Peter Pan — to never grow old. And keeps lighting up the stadium as much by his smile as by his deadly, bendy free-kick.
