Satnam Singh's career over the last couple of years has been nothing short of a roller-coaster ride.
From being the toast of the nation in 2015 by becoming the first Indian-born player to be drafted into the NBA to being sent back to play in an Indian league this year, the 21-year-old's basketball journey has gone on a downward slide.
But the Punjab lad reflects on his professional career so far with a mixture of sorrow, assurance and hope.
Sorrow, of not getting enough chances to prove himself in the Summer League and G League of the NBA while playing for Dallas Mavericks and Texas Legends in the past two years. Assurance, of getting his confidence as well as game back on track in the United Basketball Alliance (UBA), India's own professional basketball league. Hope, of taking the renewed confidence and game back into the NBA and fulfilling his dream.
"It was the toughest phase of my life," Singh told DNA when asked about the limited game time he got in the last two years in the lower level leagues of the NBA.
"It was something that was really difficult to handle for me. Because if you're not getting a lot of time to play and are spending most of your time on your bench, then for any professional sportsperson, it gets really tough.
"Dimag pe load padta hai (your brain starts stressing). You start doubting yourself, start thinking, 'what will happen now? Where will I go?' So, all those questions were buzzing in my mind," he added.
In the 2015-16 season, Singh played nine games — just two starts — for the Legends, in which he averaged 1.5 points and 1.5 rebounds per game. He was attached with the Mavericks in the Summer League the following season, but has now been released from there as well.
Much of his time, thus, was spent warming the bench, taking the 'load'.
A reason for that stress might have been the immense hype a young boy from Ballo Ke, a tiny village in Ludhiana, generated in 2015. He made national headlines, was touted as the key to open NBA's doors to India and a role model for budding cagers wanting to be part of the sport's biggest league.
Two years on, he is himself still busy trying to find the key to the NBA.
Was all that hoopla too much to handle for him?
"Yeh koi drama nahi hai, yeh sacchai hai. Yeh agar drama hota, toh mein pehle hi chodh deta (This is not drama, it's reality. If this was drama, I would've left it long ago).
"My signing in 2015 presented me as well as the entire country a big opportunity, for me as well as all youngsters wanting to play basketball in India. Whatever happened, happened for the good.
"At least it got people talking: that there's this player from India who is knocking on NBA doors. No one had got such a big chance before. From crores of people, one person got it. And I want that number to go from one to more than one in the future," he added.
As for his own future, he wants to get back into the NBA by playing a lot more basketball in the UBA as well as for the Indian national team, something the Mavericks also want him to do.
"I always want to improve my game. But how can I improve my game by just sitting on the sidelines? Your game will only improve if you play more, otherwise it will get destroyed. I want to play as much as I can, improve as much as I can and show people that I can play basketball.
"Even the people in Mavericks told me to go home, play, and come back as a better player. They, in fact, were the ones to tell me to play in India. According to them, I'm also a bit too young. They say I'll be at my best in another 2-3 years. So they have that faith in me," he said.
He has faith in himself too. And that's why despite two demotivating seasons in the NBA, Singh's goalposts haven't changed.
"I have just one goal, be it over the next one year, two years, five years, 10 years, or 20 years. I want to play on the main court of the NBA. No G League or no any league. NBA main court and only that. Even if it is for one day or two seasons, I want to be there.
"I'll be there some day, surely," he said.
